promises, promises

i have a picture of me on new year's eve, giving all of you a new year's kiss, but i can't find my camera cord so this crappy pic will have to do. sorry. the sentiment is the same. : )
i've made some resolutions, and i will (hopefully) be able to make some serious progress in all of the following areas, but, as with every year, my number one priority is to just be a better melissa. with that in mind, here are the ways that i've decided i can do that in 2009:
1. stop cussing so much. i am not, nor have i ever been, a sailor. i don't know why i insist on sounding like one.
2. put less pressure on myself with regards to the way i look. i'm not sure where i got this ridiculous standard i've imposed on my outward appearance, but it's unattainable, at best. i'm not saying there's no room for improvement, and i'd like to look the best that i can, but i'm not a freaking supermodel. as soon as someone starts paying me to weigh 120lbs, i will gladly bust my butt to get there. until then, i should be happier with what i've got.
3. go back to school. please don't comment on this one. this is a personal decision, and i'm pretty sensitive about the subject. but this is an honest list of resolutions, so it must be included.
4. save money. i'm pretty bad to spend like there's no end in sight to my funds, which leaves me doing some pretty fast talking when there is any kind of atypical financial obligation. i can do better than that.
5. keep my bedroom clean. first, i have to GET it clean. : ) my good friend heather always says, "mess outside, mess inside." that is a true statement, and i'm done with both messes.
so there you have it. none of them is really that huge an undertaking, as best as i can tell. my biggest job is to basically love me and take care of me more, which all of the above will help me to accomplish. i will continue to laugh, play, and dance as much as i can, and if i can make a serious dent in these self-improvements, then 2009 will reveal the best version of me yet.
happy new year, boys and girls. xo

new year, new image

so i saw this little activity on someone else's blog, thought it was hilarious, and decided to give it a shot. there are like 25 survey questions (your first pet, your hobby, etc) and you go to google images, type in the word/your answer, and then post the first picture that comes up. well 25 would've taken up too much space, so i decided to just do my first, middle, and last names. and the results are HILARIOUS. : )
first google image for "melissa":
this girl has 1.14 ounces of fat on her body. i'm just guessing, but i can't be too far off.
first google image for "margaret":
this is what i look like when i'm in my underwear, i swear to god. : )
first google image for "haney":
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!! very rarely do i use the phrase "lol," but i can't think of anything that i could say here that would be more appropriate. i literally lol-ed when i saw this. as a matter of fact, i loljfheaofeinvao-ed. you can just get creative with regards to what those other letters mean. i laughed until i cried. i may or may not be related to this guy.

p.s. resolutions tomorrow... i still need to think about them. happy new year's eve, duckies. be safe, have fun, love love. xo

um, oops

so i maybe might have a little bit overdone it just a smidge with yesterday's post. i told myself i wouldn't lash out on the ol' blog after that crackhead was being such a jerk on a previous entry of mine, but yesterday was like the perfect storm of online aggravation. eh, such is life. i'm over it. : )
the holiday season was quite busy in central arkansas, that's for sure. my mom was in town for a week and so i spent quite a bit of time with her and megs, then i had two days to cram in all (that's right, ALL) of my christmas shopping between working and catching up with folks in for the holidays, then i went to my dad's for a few days and ate, drank, and was generally merry. he's moving so we spent a pretty good deal of time sorting through an exorbitant amount of our things that have accumulated at his house over the years. fun? kind of. exhausting? totally. then saturday night i had a little mini-reunion with my pledge sisters from the sorority i was in for about five minutes, which was a little strange but mostly awesome. i got yelled at by some trashy skank at this bar in russellville, which is always a night-maker. and now... *sigh* now i'm just back at work, trying to catch up on sleep at home(it will never happen), and waiting for warmer weather.
it sounds like you all had fantastic christmases and i'm very glad for it. i'm not sorry that i boiled over like a pot of crazy-time tea in yesterday's post, but i will say that i will keep the outbursts to a minimum... at least i will on the blog. : ) xo

bitches, UGH

seriously, i've been noticing lately that there are some hateful bitches in the blogosphere. whether or not their tacky shit is inadvertant, it would be really fucking awesome if people would just learn how to LOCK IT UP. you know when you're little and your mama says, "if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all"? SHE WASN'T FUCKING AROUND. from anonymous bullies to "friends" leaving shit comments, this crap is seriously getting old. ugh. grow up.

so here it is

this is my merry christmas post... so... merry christmas, kids. : ) hope you get everything you asked for from santa. if you're traveling, be safe. i love you all, love your families, and will be sending christmas-y good vibes to you and yours in the coming days. love love.

it looks a little different at 25

my mommy and sister and i watched "a charlie brown christmas" yesterday, getting into the spirit of the season and eating our weight in spinach dip. i remember loving that movie (is it a movie? it's only 20 minutes long...) when i was a kid, but now, the only thing i could think when it was over is this: charlie brown may be the saddest mo-fo of all time. that poor kid! lucy's skanky friend violet actually uttered the words, "try to do something right for once in your life, charlie brown." merry effing christmas, right?

the duggars:

perpetuating the stereotype that all arkansans are crazy rednecks since 1988.