done and done

i told them.

i told them today.

i told them today that i'm rolling out.

it's all over but the crying.

but that's just an expression,

'cause i sure as shit won't be crying.

six weeks until wheels up...

i'm a complete mess of

excited and scared and nervous and calm

and a plethora of other emotions.

but, suffice it to say,

the countdown begins today.

hold onto your hat.

i'm mostly talking to me on that one.

looking back, looking forward

i've been inspired. i'm not blogging that much anymore, and that's mainly because i always feel like i'm complaining. like, when i'm having fun or have good news to share, i usually want to be on the phone and don't ever considering writing anything down. but when i'm in a shitty mood and need to get something off my chest, that's when my brain chooses to remember that i have a blog and i definitely use it in those situations. so someone reading this might go back through these posts and think, "good god that is the saddest / meanest / most worried girl on the planet." not true... i don't think... and so in a fun change of pace, as aforementioned, i've been inspired by lady gray to blog something positive. what a nice change for me. :)

without further ado, i present the top five greatest things about my life in 2009:

5. getting my own place again. man, oh man, did i miss living alone. don't get me wrong, i loved living with tater bug, but baby needs her space. and now that i have it back, i'm not at all excited about eventually having to give it up ('cause i will eventually... sigh).
4. re-connecting with old friends. the internets were very, very good to me in 2009. the twitters and the facebook and all that jazz let me virtually hold the hands of people i have missed oh so much. quite thankful for this one indeed.
3. all the travelling! goodness i feel like i've been on planes or in hotels as much as i've been in my own house last year. this will be slowing up significantly in 2010, for all the right reasons. (winkety wink!)
2. babies, babies, babies! i've been so blessed to have the opportunity to watch close friends find out babies are on the way, have babies, raise babies. seeing my friends as mommies is amazing and awe-inspiring and they make me incredibly optimistic and more calm about the time in my life when i am in the same boat.
1. scott. yeah yeah, i said it. shut up. :)

as far as resolutions go for the new year, i'm so bad at keeping specific ones like "stop biting nails" and "drink less beers" that i will just make one big, broad, sweeping resolution that i will more than likely just make every year from now on:

be nicer to self. take better care of self. put self first. and once self is steady, dole out more hugs and kisses to important other selves.

happy 2010, friends. love you all so much. :)

cranky pants, party of one

boo. i don't know if it's the weather or the season or the holidays or what, but jeezum crow i just CANNOT stay positive lately. i'm tired, i'm crabby, i'm stressed out, and i just really really really would like to snap the hell out of it. my weekend was super hectic and eventful in all the wrong ways, my job is increasingly tedious and unfulfilling, my apartment is a wreck, my skin is dry and pale, christmas is about five seconds away, and oh god, the rain rain rain and the cold cold cold. no amount of deep breathing or wishful thinking is negating the craaaaaaab inside of meeeeee. the good news is that what goes up must come down, and you know, vice versa. so i'll see you on the other side of this cranky-faced funk, friends. :) xo

predicament

this week marks a year of me working with my company. and in lieu of cake and ice cream to celebrate (yeah, right... i work with all dudes over the age of 40... no one celebrates like i do), i'd like to ask for a raise. i don't get paid time off, i don't have a chance to earn overtime, and have not received an increase in pay since my first day. i'm sort of a bad ass around here, and i think i've earned a raise. the problem is, HOW THE HELL DO I ASK FOR A RAISE?! every scenario i imagine in my head makes come off sounding like an ingrate or a sniveling jerk. maybe it's because, deep down, i feel sort of like an asshole asking for a raise a mere three months before i say peace out to this place, but still. end date or no, i DO deserve a raise, right? i mean, it's been a year... right? help, friends. HELP. ayudame. how do i get more money for my (quasi) hard work? or should i just leave it alone?

because it's friday

and because i can't stop looking at it, i present the most horrible / most awesome thing you have ever seen in your life, guaranteed. special thanks to jacob for posting this first. HILARIOUS, and sadly, an accurate representation of how the general public of our country sees the world. uh, you're welcome. ;)

por las mamas

so, the biggest part of this story is that i just found out that my very good friend katie is PREGS and she's due in may, and there is no feasible way for me to be happier for her. i love her, and i love her husband, and they are going to be phenomenal parents. PHENOMENAL, and i'm sure of that. i am already over the moon about their little bundle of joy, and that is the take away message from this post, okay?

but, for your consideration, i submit the following and you tell me: is the most annoying thing ever or what?!

so i found out about sweet katie bug's bun in the oven in an email, from an ex-coworker of mine / current coworker of katie's. apparently, katie pie's broken the news in her office through an email with an attachment of the ultrasound photos. so i receive this email, FORWARDED, from said coworker and the only thing it says is, "did you know?" HELL NO I DIDN'T KNOW!!! so i immediately call katie and scream "are you pregnant?!" and once she verifies this information i start to cry and say how excited i am and congratulations and all of that mess and she's all emotional and i think it's for the same reason... but apparently she's emotional because she's so pissed off that she wants to kill this particular coworker. see, katie's plan was to make plans with me this weekend so that she could tell me in person, and coworker has ruined it. not only did i hear it from someone besides the mama-to-be herself, but i got the news in an email. katie's not pleased, and i can't blame her. i really should've thought about that before i called her, but I WAS SO STOKED that i just couldn't think straight, you know? surely you know.

anyhow, i guess my point is: tacky, right? forwarding an email with info like that? what if she wanted to surprise me personally (which she did)? what if she didn't want me to know? what if what if what if? help me out here, mamas, how pissed off would YOU be at this coworker?

incidentally, yes, i know i'm sort of doing the same tacky thing by telling you here, but you don't know her, right? so it's different. i think...

attention friends

this is probably going to come across as very arrogant and self-involved, but i think you all know that i am those things a lot of the time, so i will say it anyway: i miss you. i want to spend time with you. before too long i will go and it will not be as easy to come over and split a bottle of wine, it will not be as easy to share a good hug, it will not be as easy to be friends. so we should soak up the easy while we've got it, shouldn't we? so, as of right this second, my free time is yours if you want it. see? arrogant. self-involved. but i love you, and i don't know how else to say it. xo